Tuesday, August 4, 2009

GLITCHWATCH 1000

Greetings from within the diseased mind of an Alzheimer’s sufferer!

If you want to stay out of the locked ward, just follow these simple instructions:

  1. Remember to wear a belt. You may not actually need a belt with which to hold up your pants, but if you go out without a belt, chances are you are in for a raised eyebrow, confirming decline and lack of awareness. Stay spiffy!
  2. Eat well, but don’t overdo it—slim, fit and well-groomed is the order of the day. So go easy on the carbs; and never let anyone see you wolfing down potato chips while standing over the snack drawer!
  3. Common courtesies go a long way, especially with women your age or older.
  4. Keep a small notebook handy…not just for mnemonic assistance, but to jot down the extraordinary thoughts and ideas that are worth saving for later. You never know when a great idea will wander onto the scene….but, then again, don’t hold your breath!

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